Your friend is a striker. My husband and I have been married for 6 years. By the time you're searching the Internet for solutions, you've already begun daydreaming about splitting up and enjoying a single life where you're responsible for yourself, and to yourself. The worst case scenario happens when one does cheat. I am starting to look for more male "friends" but scared of cheating on my husband. And here’s the cold, hard truth: if you’re dating a married woman who isn’t in the middle of a divorce, she found something she was missing from her marriage with you — but she could have just as easily have found it with someone else. Yours is one of the best Hubs I've read so far. Suzette Vearnon from Raleigh on April 27, 2012: Jellygator, my hat off to you. Married But Feels Single. What should I do? Do married women look down on single women. 82Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland. I also am aware that my husband is no soul mate of mine. I can’t explain it, and I haven’t met anyone yet who makes me feel differently, but at this moment I can safely say that being single is my natural state. Like, seriously, it surprises me to no end how vehemently they try to argue with me when they find out I’m not actively searching for a partner. Marriage definitely has it ups and downs along the way. I am constantly tired and frustrated that I have to do everything on my own. All she seems to do these days is complain and criticize! It's odd that now when im single, I feel a lot less lonely than when I was taken. Well said, Dashing. If you've done this and yet feel single, it's because they're not invested in your relationship emotionally to the same degree that you are. Our busyness repeatedly invites its presence into our marriage. 2. Let's look at a brief description of each, and the best tools for addressing the causes of loneliness in your relationship once you've pinpointed the cause. Now, he isn't my husband anymore. But there’s a school of thought out there that getting married in order to avoid loneliness is a mistake. We like to feel like we're working hard to earn the love of a girl we're going after. They need to feel seen, heard and that they matter. 09 Feb 2020 By Moms Exchange. I feel resentful towards him, because when we got married I did not expect to be a single mother with 2 kids and a … Incompatible ones cannot. They don't champion their partner. But boy, do people hate that. I think you're right about it being pretty common in relationships, but I get so saddened when I hear about people who go for weeks at a time feeling this way! They feel your single friends will be a bad influence and advise you to keep married friends only. Lovelovemeloveme from Cindee's Land on August 01, 2012: This was a really well written sort out article. Sadly, relationships do progress through changes like that. I am glad to hear that you're feeling better now. Note: If you're dealing with prolonged silent treatments, you may be in an abusive relationship. Wouldn't it be nice if we just knew from the very beginning exactly how it would be? Only pressure. "It's easier to maintain a fire than it is to reignite a spark! Married But Feels Single. This leads to power struggles and before some partners realize it, they have already ended their relationship. They feel pressured to maintain an acceptable image. Sometimes partners simply don't attend to their relationship enough to grow together. “Because it’s pastors who preach messages to help married people stay married, but not preach messages to help single people not feel like they are damaged.” “Because it’s in the church that women’s ministries hold seminars for single women to help them wait for their Boaz, but no one is teaching them how to, instead, live a vibrant, full life.” ". The only thing compatible with love is love itself. The best relationships have a deep sense of friendship that's characterized by mutual respect, trust, and appreciation. This matter tie gele ooo, why did they get married in the first place? When You Feel Alone In Your Relationship And Are Raising Your Kids Alone, You're What's Known As A "married Single Mom." What we see on television. There's a fine line between being reserved or needing time and the kind of silence that is emotionally abusive. There are at least seven common reasons that couples grow distant from one another. Sometimes several of these reasons are present at the same time, making it even harder for a couple to recover their relationship. - Family - Nairaland. The married man, in turn, uses this to fuel his flirtatious intentions. And I had that lonely feeling in my marriage. Shortly after we got married, I got pregnant… with twins (a boy and a girl). I feel relieved that I am not the only person feeling that way. Because you are not. (33992 Views) Married But I'm Not Connected With My Husband, Hence I'm Depressed / I Want To Get Married, But My Parents Don't Like The Girl / I Want To Get Married But My Family Is Insisting I Must Settle Everybody First Like a terminal virus, isolation invades your marriage silently, slowly, and painlessly at first. It sounds like a lot, but think of the many extra tasks each of us handles regularly. When you said "I do," you thought you were committing to a lifetime of cooperation, shared experiences, and mutual support. I wouldn't call it a longing but I've been married for 10 years and I have moments where I miss single, kidless life! If you're a man, you wonder what happened to that fun woman you once knew. We’re trying to alleviate loneliness. jellygator (author) from USA on July 30, 2012: Thank you! (34005 Views), Married But I'm Not Connected With My Husband, Hence I'm Depressed / I Want To Get Married, But My Parents Don't Like The Girl / I Want To Get Married But My Family Is Insisting I Must Settle Everybody First (2) (3) (4), (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (Reply) (Go Down), (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (Reply). "What goes on here should stay here" is their mantra, and it can lead to a very lonely life. Some married women believe their single friends are jealous of them. Then, he should search the "plan" icon for a devotional called "Kingdom marriage". You liked what he liked. This is a good sign the relationship needs work or better to let go. :) manatita44 from london on July 30, 2012: Thanks. Although I realize that counseling can help some couples, I believe the majority of couples wouldn't have communication problems if the "real" problem was addressed. Because everyone, married or not, feels lonely sometimes.